It's okay to say NO

Is it okay to say NO?  Why do we feel guilty when obligations from friends, family and even peers make us feel as if saying NO is forbidden.   I want to say I have struggled in this area for a long time especially if you are anything like me and are always doing for others and not for yourself.  You can see everyone around you taking time for themselves or not taking on all the tasks you would naturally do but yet you are.

Well it stops here, we are okay to say NO.  I say we, as we are a family and we support each other.  We must know that saying NO isn't going to end the world nor will it drastically effect who we are becoming as a human being.  Rather its actually going to allow us to balance our life out more.

Listen in as we discuss this further.

Be  Blessed

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Transcript

Selina Davis: 0:00

Hey, it's your girl, Selina Davis host of Butt Naked Wisdom coming to you with a wonderful episode. And I want to talk about today it's okay to say no. I mean, I have fought so many times in areas of my life, always felt the need to want to say yes to doing so much stuff for other people and never say no, because of fear of what people are going to think and say, and the expectations of me that people are placed on me and even me placing those expectations on myself. But is it okay to say no? Can we say no? Are we allowed to say? No, I think we are, I think when you have put so many different things into priority in your life. And, you know, in order for you to have time for yourself, in order for you to prioritize what may be important for your life. Sometimes we do have to say no, and it's okay to say no, it's okay to not take on every project, it's okay to, you know, say no to a relative or a family member that is close and potentially relying on you. It's okay for you to just switch off and they know that you just don't want to do anything that day, or you don't want to do that task because it doesn't feel right to you or it's draining you or you feel stressed out because of it or you feel so overly committed to a situation that you do need a break. So I want to just encourage you to just really look at areas of your life where you may constantly be going and chime in. And you know, really just potentially weighing yourself down and not really taking any time for yourself. And I'm totally guilty of that I do not spend enough time on myself. I don't prioritize myself at all, to be completely honest. And it's something that I have to work on is something that I need to be more consciously aware of the eye and being more intentional in the time that I give to myself, because I don't do it. I don't do it enough. And I felt guilty. I felt guilty for so many years. And I've always put other people before me. But I think it's really important that we look at ourselves. And I think this slowing down of this year. And things that have happened to a lot of us this year has really just allowed us to reflect on ourselves, our mindset, our personal life, our wants, our needs, our desires, you know where we want to be in the next two to five years or even 10 years time, and looking at things that we want in our lives and starting to prioritize what those things may be for us. And I just want to encourage you that it is okay to say no, it doesn't have to feel, you know, burdensome in time for you. It doesn't have to be a weight that you are holding, because you want to say no to a situation but don't feel as if you can because you are constantly given out and always given out to other people. But it's time for you to start looking at yourself and looking at what you want and prioritizing what is important in your life and areas in which you want to start focusing on you. And I'm saying this to you. But I'm also saying this to me, I have to do it, I am approaching a wonderful age coming up. And I just really want to start taking care of myself, stop focusing on me start taking time and doing the thing that I need to do in order to be who I want to be. And I've done a lot of that this year in terms of mindset growth, and reading and edifying myself on the outward but not really having a lot of me time and not having a lot of time in isolation by myself or away from the family. And I'm just constantly Go, go, go, go go. And even yesterday, I just decided I didn't want to do anything, I just cancelled the thing that I had set out in the day because I needed a day I've been working and working and working. And I haven't had any time off and I just needed to switch off and stay in the same place without feeling guilty and not do anything. I literally sat there for the whole day. And that is not something that I do all the time. It's not something that I've even really had the opportunity to do enough. And I just needed to do it. So I just want to encourage you that saying no is okay. And I give you that authority to say no in areas that you feel you need to hold back in or you need to rein your energies back from so you can refocus and prioritize where you want to be what life looks like for you how you want to show up in your day. How you want to feel at the end of the day. Do you want to feel exhausted? Do you want to feel as if he was so drained that you haven't got anything else to give? No, I don't think that is the answer. I think that we want to feel like we've really balanced our day out and that we've achieved what we need to achieve in a day. So I just want to encourage you Stay blessed. Let's continue to be better versions of ourselves as we grow together and learn together. God bless you and speak t